I can’t believe I actually have a chance of getting him back.
What do you do when your boyfriend is threatening to leave you?
Have you ever found yourself in a situation with your boyfriend when you just happened to, accidentally like, say the wrong thing which elicits a bad reaction from your guy?
Then before you know it your are backpedaling and saying things that are making worse and worse. And as your boyfriend gets more annoyed, you get more defensive, and before you even realize it, you have opened up a can of worms.
It’s as if all your worst boyfriend nightmares have come crawling out and whatever you say just makes things worse
If you do, you are entering into dangerous territory. I consider it a quicksand for all couples when either of them start talking about past experiences with their boyfriends or girlfriends.
We would like to think we are all mature and secure and can handle such dialogue. And it is indeed tough to slay the dragon of curiosity. But let me tell now, just in case you have not heard it from yet.
Stay clear of talking about your past romances. If you do, it like entering the murky waters of boyfriends past.
There is a lot to be said about practicing the “less is more” strategy with it comes down to this kind of things.
But sometimes, we just can’t help ourselves. As much as she tried to wiggle out of her predicament, her boyfriend’s face grew redder and his temperament becomes more animated.
So, I was not too surprised when she told me that her boyfriend suddenly stood up and screamed at her if she wanted to go chasing after her old flame, then she ought too. And then he turned his wrath on the one thing he knew would catch her by surprise.
Talk slowly. Move slowly. In time, your boyfriend will begin mirroring your behavior and calm down to climb off his high horse. In most cases when a boyfriend is talking nutty and throwing around a lot of angry words meant to reduce you to rubble, he is just acting out his anger. Anger, when vented, tends to eventually extinguish itself. So just allow your guy to work it out of his system and remain calm.
Women are masters of passive-aggressive statements. And while you will be very tempted to start in with your counter attack after coming under your boyfriend’s verbal assault, just hold them in your pocket. It will not serve you in the long run. It is more likely that your boyfriend will just get more riled up.
So while you are remaining calm and patiently letting your boyfriend to vent, just know that there is a fuse on how long you can do this. If your guy cannot gain control of his temper after 5 or 10 minutes or if he becomes emotionally or even physically abusive, there is no room for your continued presence in the room. So if your boyfriend ramps it up and continues to lose it and starts in on you about this thing or another, then resorts to telling you that he is threw with you if you don’t start doing “this or that”, you need to end it. How do you do so? It is simple. Leave. Do what he is threatening to do to you. Leave the room or where ever you are. Now, you have choices as to where you go and how long you stay away. If you believe your boyfriend can still redeem himself and the two of you just need to be separated, you go exclaim, “I need space”, and then move to another room for several minutes or longer. If the situation is more explosive and your boyfriend’s temperament is clearly abusive, then leave the house. Tell him “your behavior is scaring me” and then leave and don’t come back for a day or longer. There is no one right answer for when you leave and how long you stay away. It varies for each couple depending on a variety of factors. But one things is a constant. You are not to allow yourself to become a verbal punching bag for your boyfriend no matter how much you love him. Once you set the “fuse” (in you mind) and it burns out, then take the initiative and remove yourself from the equation.
Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself, even if your boyfriend has convinced you that the relationship is hanging in the balance. You should never play ball with those who think it is acceptable to push you into a corner with intimidation or threatening behavior. A relationship is usually doomed for failure if you are negotiating with your boyfriend from a position of weakness and fear. Think about it. You are in the wrong relationship if you find yourself in that situation and that is not healthy.
It is not in their makeup to look that way. Tell your boyfriend he looks rugged. Tell him you love his broad shoulders. Express to him how much you feel protected and safe around him.
All of those things appeals to your guy’s ego and his sense of his own masculinity. Pretty guys just don’t get it done and your boyfriend won’t like being compared to anything feminine.
Now if it becomes a habitual thing, multiple nights of the week, then that is different. But in general, if you boyfriend wants to have a poker or video game night with his buddies, let him.
You use the time to go out with your girlfriends and make it count.
Just because you are a couple doesn’t mean you should spend every minute together.
In fact, that is not healthy. You both need your own lives and enjoy the company of your friends.
When you and your guy hook up again, it will be all that more enjoyable.